MARRIED...AT 17?

Yeah, so I understand that in some cultures, having an arranged marriage is mandatory, and getting married during your teenage years is a sign of good luck. In older times, while you were a young lady, your parents paired you with the man who would promise you(and the family, somtimes) the most fortune and stability, while it didn't matter at all if the man was 15 or more years older than you. Which brings me to my purpose of writing: I'm estatic that I live in a free country where the idea of an arranged marriage is far out the door.



After I was dismissed from church today, I found myself talking with the mother of one of my friends, who had very recently tied the knot with a guy that she's known for a little over a year. She had just turned 18 years old. In the talks with my friend, she explained to me that from the moment that they had seen each other, they knew they had to have one another. From then on, they were together; the families of both had approved each other's choice, and before you know it, her knight-in-shining-armor had got down on one knee and asked to have her hand in marriage. An apartment for the two had been bought an paid for in full before the wedding even took place. They seemed to be a match made in heaven, a page right out of a book of fairytales.



I flicked through the camera her mother gave to me, filled with pictures of a wedding from heaven. Her dress was gorgeous and his tux was Hugo Boss. But as I flipped from picture to picture, I coudn't ignore a peculiar sensation tossing and turning in the pit of stomach. Though it would be natural to be a tad bit jealous of how beautiful she looked and how handsome he was, recongnized the feeling as fear. She was just one of the few young people who was affiliated with my church, and all the others had already gotten married and left. All of a sudden, I felt an invisible pressure to get married pressing upon me.

Truth is, I know that I'm nowhere near ready for that level of committment. It's wonderful to daydream about big white dresses, thousands of flowers, gorgeous venues, best friends that would be your maids and matrons of honor. It may even ease the mind to believe that my current BF and I would actually make it to the alter. But being completely honest with myself, I know marriage is the farthest thing from my mind. I enjoy the perks of being a young woman able to date whoever I please without any permanent bondage to them. I am in no way downing teenagers who choose to get married early, I simply do not think it's for everyone, let alone, myself. I do believe it takes a great of thought and consideration from ANYONE contemplating marriage. As for me, I think I'll put myself first, and make sure I accomplish all of my goals that have to do with only before I give myself to someone else. Because, in marriage, you give up the "I's" for an "us". And I'm just not to keen on doing that at the moment.